I was raised Catholic (Roman Catholic) by my parents.

In my early years, I enjoyed the liturgy. I mouthed all the priest's speaking parts. I memorized the Latin mass (Catholic religious service), and later, memorized the slightly watered-down English language service. As a boy, I attended two summers of camp at a seminary upstate New York. As a teenager, I enjoyed Sunday "folk mass", a less formal guitar-accompanied service.

My wife was raised in the Christian Science faith, but growing up, she attended a variety of Protestant and Catholic services. While dating, we attended Christmas mass together for several years, and we both enjoyed it.

Our marriage was held in a Catholic church. But soon after, I found it was difficult to sit through an entire mass. During the service, there were no unscripted interactions between the priests and the congregation. So it was written, and it would be done. Period. To put it simply, I found that format increasingly boring.

I became impatient with priests who would privately say they disagreed with church doctrine, but who would publicly defend the church on issues like: not allowing women to be priests, refusing to allow priests to marry, not performing or honoring same sex unions, etc.

I was always curious why there was so little focus in the Catholic church on the Bible as a free-standing text. Instead of encouraging people to read the Bible and learn on their own, the Catholic church gave their own interpretations through Sunday "readings".

We stopped attending religious services for a few years. Like many other people, upon having our first child, we decided that we should get religiously involved again. We wanted to pick a religious home, attend Sunday services, and eventually take our child to their "Sunday School" classes.

We attended Lutheran, Methodist, Presbyterian, Catholic, Episcopal, and Unity services. Our longest stint was as Lutherans, where our son was baptized.

Round about 1988, a kindly next-door neighbor introduced me to Unitarian Universalism, but did so unobtrusively. Visiting her home one day, I saw "UU" pamphlets in her living room, and asked if I could take one home to read. At the time we were attending a Presbyterian church, and I was busy memorizing scripture, readying myself for my public "statement of faith" to the congregation.

The ideas in the UU pamphlets were absolutely radical, compared to the conservative ideas we were surrounded by in the Presbyterian church. I recall thinking that I should cast the pamphlets aside, because they seemed heretical. Over a few painfully self-conscious weeks, I found myself needing more information about the Unitarian Universalist faith, despite my current Presbyterian church's promise of an eternity of hell-fire if I allowed myself to stray from the "righteous path".

There was nothing funny about it at the time. I felt guilty about reading the UU pamphlets. I thought long and hard about the Presbyterian's promise of damnation if I went off the "path of truth". I allowed myself to experience anguish over the idea of considering the seven UU principles.

Maybe God was not vindictive. Maybe God wanted people to be good to each other now, and not wait for heaven or hell to measure up. Just maybe God was benevolent, and forgave people for their mistakes. I started to become hopeful that this really was true.

The God I encountered in the Presbyterian faith seemed to be close-minded, easy to anger, and acted childishly when things didn't go his way. After some more consideration, I realized that I really didn't like this kind of God.

The discovery that I had a choice of "which God" to believe was immense.

To be continued... 11/25/2003 11:50PM

Hi again. I recently read the book "Freedom from God". It was a bit rough around the edges in places, but it was an enjoyable book overall. I like living each moment fully - it compares to what the author calls "experiencing a sense of wonder".

Removing the word god (or "God") from my vocabulary and actively replacing that word with other more descriptive words has had a direct and proportionate affect on my ability to experience my life. Think about it. Any time you apply a name to something, you stop wondering about it, because your mind says "OK, got it - NEXT subject". This is a darn shame. I have decided to stop limiting my thoughts.
Here is an excerpt from the book. Its a bit wordy but as I said, overall I enjoyed the book, and I recommend it to you if you want to risk thinking outside the cultural box.

To be continued... 8/11/2004 10:59AM